"Often the tomb contains, without knowing it, 

two hearts in the same coffin." (Alphonse de Lamartine)

In memoriam of Elizabeth Guaracao and

 Ramiro Augusto Peña Higuera

Death is an inevitable part of human life; however, facing the loss of a loved one is the most painful and heartbreaking experiences we can faces. The pain can become overwhelming and make us feel like it surpasses our capacity to bear it. It's normal to feel deep sadness, anguish, and even disbelief in the face of this imminent reality.

When we lose someone close, we often resist accepting their absence. We cling to hope that they will somehow return to us, that it's all just a misunderstanding or a bad dream from which we will soon awaken. This denial is a common stage of the grieving process and serves as an emotional defense that protects us from the immense pain that comes with loss. But prolonging denial can delay the healing process.

Grieving is a unique and personal journey that each individual experiences differently. There is no predetermined path or timeline for grief; each person lives through a unique process, taking the time they need. This can vary depending on personality, the relationship with the departed, and the circumstances of the loss.

Embracing the pain to accept and heal

Just like physical wounds, emotional ones requires time to heal. We want the pain to disappear, but it won't happen overnight; it takes patience and time, no matter how deeply we feel it.

Firstly, it's important to allow ourselves to feel all the emotions that arise in the grieving process. Many people may urge us not to cry or to suppress what we're feeling, but when it comes to grieving, there are no "right" or "wrong" emotions; all are to be expected. We must accept the range of emotions to process them. Let's avoid repressing what we feel.

Of course, this process is tough, so seeking emotional support on this thorny path may be necessary. Expressing our feelings to close friends, family, or a therapist will be of great help. They can help validate what we feel and provide comfort. It's also true that not all the words they say will be the most appropriate, even if they come from love.

This narrow and winding path of grief is only traveled by those who have loved and been loved in return. Grieving processes cannot be compared either. Each person experiences them differently. However, conversing with others who have experienced similar situations can help us not feel alone, in addition to providing perspectives that can help us manage our emotions.

Self-care practices are also fundamental during grief. This can involve taking care of our physical health through good nutrition, regular exercise, and adequate rest. Additionally, it's important to take care of our mental and emotional health by practicing activities that bring us comfort and joy, such as meditation, art, music, or simply spending time outdoors.

Another crucial aspect of the healing process is finding meaningful ways to honor and remember the loved one we have lost. This may involve creating a memory space in the home, planting a commemorative garden, celebrating rituals or traditions in their honor, or participating in activities they enjoyed together. Finding meaningful ways to keep the memory of the loved one alive can help us feel connected to them and find comfort amid our pain. 

These rituals or commemorative acts are not obligatory either, and no psychologist should impose; these are merely a suggestion for keeping the memory of the departed alive among us. It is not obligatory either; it can be performed by those who feel prepared. 

Finally, it's important to remember that the grieving process is a continuous journey and that there is no definitive end to the pain we feel from the loss of a loved one. As we progress on our healing journey, it's natural to experience ups and downs and moments of deep sadness, and when we feel better, we may experience the pain again. These are just the twists and turns of life's path. Allowing ourselves to feel our emotions, which includes embracing the pain of departure, seeking support, and taking care of ourselves, can lead us toward acceptance and inner peace as we honor the legacy of those who have gone before us.

 Ig: @tuacompanantemocional