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Scientists say they know how long your business will last

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Everything published on the internet yesterday needed to be double- and triple-checked for sincerity. But this was no April Fool’s:

Publicly-traded businesses have expiration dates, regardless of their size and the services they offer. And according to to new study from scientists at the Santa Fe Institute in New Mexico, the average lifespan is about ten years.

The study came about due to the “remarkably little quantitative work" on what economists call “company morality.”

"It doesn't matter if you're selling bananas, airplanes, or whatever," says Marcus Hamilton, one of study’s three lead scientists. The mortality rate is the same regardless of the company's age or its economic sector.

Hamilton notes that the magic ten-year number can change between firms, but that ten years was nonetheless the average before a company is bought out, merged, or liquidated.