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"Caring for my parents is not a sacrifice, it is an honor"

Over 8 million Hispanics in the US devote themselves to caring for a loved one, whether due to illness or to old age. 

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A recent study evidenced that in one third of Hispanic households in the US someone is devoted to caring for a loved one, whether due to illness or to old age.

Pedro Rivera, well known in the Philadelphia’s Hispanic community, has had direct experience with this situation.

Last month, this Hispanic resigned as Chairman of the Board of Directors of the “Asociación de Puertorriqueños en Marcha” (APM), to the Board of the Hispanic Chamber of Commerce and to a high-level position in Wachovia, to take care of his parents in Miami.

Rivera, was born and raised in Puerto Rico and moved to Miami with his family in 1982.  He studied Business Administration in Tampa, and attained his PhD in Law, in Massachussets.  In 1991 he accepted a job in Philadelphia, where he moved to without knowing anyone; he made a life for himself and became deeply involved in the community.

This lawyer had a life full of professional and personal success until his mother’s illness changed his life completely at the beginning of this year.

“My mother was diagnosed with lymphatic cancer in January and since then it has been quite difficult to constantly travel to Miami; she suffered from the side effects of chemotherapy, lost her hair, contracted many infections and got depressed.  Later, in May, my dad was diagnosed with bone marrow cancer.  It was then that everything became very difficult and I decided to give it all up”, said Rivera.

The Puerto Rican sold his home and momentarily suspended his professional career after making the decision to care for his parents. 

“I am in a transitional process and though giving up my post in the APM and the Chamber of Commerce was difficult, I feel peaceful with my decision.  I think it is more important to be and spend time with them, enjoy them now that they are living, because one cannot recover lost time”, Rivera stated.  Now, the Puerto Rican is back home, doing the shopping, taking his parents to the doctor, helping clean the house and, above all, spending time with his loved ones.  He asserts that taking care of and sharing with the elderly are family values of great importance in the Latino community. 

“It is something instilled in our culture.  I saw my mother care for my grandmother until she passed away.  When my grandmother became ill with Alzheimer’s, she moved to Puerto Rico and was there for one year and my dad flew from Miami to Puerto Rico to see her”, Rivera remembers.

This fondness for his culture also affected the relationship that Rivera has had with his couple for 13 years now.

“He is Anglo-Saxon and his culture is colder, he never fit in to the family.  Going to Miami to care for my mother was always a conflict and he never understood.  He would say, “Why do you have to do that, when my grandmother is in a nursing home” and we (Hispanics) do not use nursing homes”.

“Part of the failure of my relationship with my partner was definitely that we were from two cultures that are so different. My parents’ cancer was something that he did not want to deal with”.

Rivera is an example of the reality lived by many Hispanics in the country, according to an investigation presented on November 17th of this year by Alianza Nacional de Ciudadanos and Evercare.

According to the study, four out of every 10 persons decide to make an important change regarding their job, whether to quit or to work less hours, in order to be able to be with those that need them.

Caring for my parents, for me, is not a sacrifice, but an honor.  I am willing to leave behind everything I have and had for my parents.  I want to do for them what they did for me”, Rivera stated.

MAIN RESULTS FROM THE STUDY

Almost three fourths of those providing care are women, age 43, in average, in charge of a loved one whose average age is 62.

Thirty-one percent of those caring for a family member works full time, 20 percent work part time, and 1 percent has a different job situation.

One out of every two Hispanics cares for two elderly family members at the same time and more or less half of them also have children younger than 18 years of age who also require their presence and care.

Those Hispanics that provide care tend to find themselves in more intense situations.  Sixty-three percent (63%) of them are in situations of a high burden levels, compared to 51 percent of non Hispanics. 

Hispanics who provide care spend more hours a week providing their services (an average of 37 hours).

They tend to rate the care provider situation as one that is not stressful.
Eighty-four percent (84%) of those providing care, believe that it is what is expected of them given how they were raised.

Four out of every 10 people states to have made some important change regarding their job, whether to quit their job or work less hours.

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